While You Were Sleeping

"i planned to marry peter, but married jack instead. thank goodness my father was right. life doesn't always turn out the way you plan.
.......
Peter once asked me when i fell in love with jack. and i told him, "it was while you were sleeping."

if you were able to watch the movie "While You Were Sleeping," you know what the above quote is all about. haaaay. nice lines from nice love stories. i love quoting them all.

often, we want the kind of life we dreamed it to be, like what career we want to pursue or, just like in the movie, who we want to spend the rest of our life with. but sometimes, something happens just in between....and out of the way. and sometimes, we end up being more grateful that "life doesn't always turn out the way we plan."

i remember what i had read in ODB. the stagecoach story. there's this kid who fervently asked his mom for this particular stagecoach for a Christmas gift. he threw tantrums and begged more like a normal kid does until his mom said, "uhmmmm, let's see." he knew then that he'd get what he wants. so come Christmas. he opened his gift and was confident of what he's going to find inside. sure enough, the stagecoach that he'd asked for came into view. he was sooo happy until his brother told him, "asking for THAT stagecoach was the dumbest thing you did. mom actually bought you a bigger one but since you heartily asked for that, she exchanged the bigger stagecoach for that smaller one." and his happiness fades.

too bad that most of the time, what we think is best for us isn't really what's best. there's something better than the best we have in mind. we thank God for answering our prayers with a YES, but there are times too, that we also have to thank Him for the NOs.  after all, He's the one who knows best.

allow me to share to you certain lines from one of my favorite Christian songs.

"God is too wise to be mistaken

 God is too good to be unkind

 So when you don't understand

 When you don't see His plan

 When you can't trace His hand

 TRUST HIS HEART"

He loves us so much He just wants the best for us.  All we have to do is trust His heart.  Ain't that cool?

meet my new baby -- nikki

dec. 19, 2011. that's the date i got Nikki. and boy, is she so gorgeous! there's something about her that made me finally decide to buy her -- her color. i have been planning to buy an SLR for a long time but it always gets postponed....until i saw her -- Nikon D3100 RED.

red color never fails to attract me. most especially if it's combined with black. my phone, named Ozy, and my guitar, named Alexis, are black-and-red combi as well. red and black - i'm just a big fan of that duo. so when i saw Nikki, i fell in love with it at first sight, the same feeling i felt with Ozy and Alexis. some say that Nikki's color doesn't look pro. who cares? after all, i'm really not a pro. and having a pro cam doesn't make one a pro either, so why bother?

so to cut the long intro short, i present to you, my new baby, Nikki. :) included also are my other two babies of the same color, Ozy and Alexis. ♥

"Happiness is anyone and anything at all....that's loved by you!"

P-A-S-T Fever

(a September 19, 2005 post from my now-defunct friendster blog, Innermost Thoughts)

If I were to re-live the past, I'd start on the day some time in between of Nov and Dec in 1999. Things could've been better OR could've been worse. Well, I just think it would be worth taking the risk. But who am I to tell?

Of course I know I can't turn back the time and that I have to deal with reality here (that's what life requires me to)... & not with those good ole movies where they have time machines, genies in a bottle, fairy godmothers or an aero car that takes you back to the future. Not to mention Ina Magenta's and Faye's.

Yes, we all have to deal with reality no matter how badly we want a certain dream/fantasy or whatever you call it. Sadly. & now, the reality is the present. & all that I can and have to do is to live and deal with it. "Oh, jing, can you just please forget the regrets of the past?" the inner voice within me says and in addition to that, "Real life doesn't include those magic. In lieu of that, there are the hopes, the prayers, the faith that go along with reality." Okay then. Maybe I'll just try to see where those 3 will lead me.

• There's a song that says, "Some good things never last." But I never heard a song that implies, if not says, "Some good things don't happen merely because they aren't just meant to happen." Another song to add to the long list of break-up songs. So, any composers out there?
• They say everything happens for a reason. Can somebody tell me then the reason why such is such?
• Sometimes there are just questions best left unasked. For NO ONE can provide you the answers though every inch of your soul tells you that there MUST be a reason.
• I really believe that for every question, there IS an answer. There MUST be. We should just dig in deeper and a little deeper and a little deeper until you find the answers just as miners do to find gold mines.
• Further digging and pondering and I've concluded that maybe some reasons are not revealed 'coz they are just too great and too incomprehensible for a human mind to absorb. Better answer: Maybe, just maybe, good things don't sometimes last because there are better things yet to happen that's in store...gifts just waiting to be opened...or PERHAPS love just waiting to unfold...or could be just any thing else...(Bat ba naman kase walang emoticons dito sa blog eh???!!?!)

------------------------------------------END----------------------------------------

Nov. 2, 2011. Oh, boy! Those were some serious thoughts! Did I really write that? Haha! And it sounds like I was really talking to myself there when I wrote it. My golly! Doing nothing at work, 9 hrs a day, really makes you think of things you wouldn't be able to think of on a normal day. All I could ever and must do that time at the office was to look busy and so my mind wandered to wherever-part-of-the-world. Haha!

"isn't it ironic, don't you think?"

(below is an excerpt from my "Present State" post dated Aug. 23, 2005 from my now-defunct friendster blog, Innermost Thoughts)

"had lost 6 lbs the past month. but already gained the 2 lbs. 4 more lbs to go. funny how i am surrounded with people desperate to lose weight while here i am trying to gain the pounds others would be so happy to lose!!! oh yeah. that's just how life goes!"

now, fast-forward to Oct. 29, 2011. being reminded of my old state makes me smile. i was just 94 lbs that time for i lost 6 lbs 'coz i got sick. 94 lbs!!! i can't believe it! i was sooo skinny then that i always included this line in my prayer before meal—Lord, sana po magpataba po 'to sa katawan ko. haha! imagine that??? and now, i'm trying my very hard to NOT gain another pound. it's a SIN!!! haha! in 2005, NEVER had i ever imagined myself wanting to lose weight. the "diet" and "exercise" words were so alien to me. now, every big food intake is equivalent to 10-20 minute exercise. life couldn't be more ironic, eh?

yeah, i am not fat but 110-112 lbs is my ideal weight. it's the maximum so i must maintain that level. it's okay if i lose some more lbs but to gain even a pound is, as i had said, a sin. so there. that's my present state now. :D

An Hour of a Wonderful Journey

(a July 4, 2006 post from my now-defunct friendster blog, Innermost Thoughts)

Last night, I was searching for some quotes by Ralph Waldo Emerson, Mark Twain, & others that I had written in one of my journals. Little did I know that my searching would take me to a journey to the past.

I was flipping through the pages of my diary, looking for the quotes. I was not able to find them. What I found instead is myself caught up in a different time. I stumbled across the baduy poems that I made during college days...the "basketball court" times in my latter years in college and even after I graduated...the texts (forwarded and personal) that I had jotted down which I would like myself to be reminded of in the future (which happened to be last night)...all the places that I'd been, who I was with, the little acts and feelings of the moment—from the mundane little details of everyday life to the wonderful, unforgettable moments. I was flipping through the pages, just skimming the notes. smiling time and again for the past troubles, downfalls and pains, and smiling even more for the PRICELESS moments. Flipping, skimming, smiling. Now stretch that out to 1 hour.

It is indeed nice to be reminded of your past once in a while. But as what they say, all things come to an end. The journey lasted for an hour. I knew I had to end it when my face became quite itchy of the dust my old diaries possess (haha!) and when my head felt quite dizzy being deprived of an early rest. So I closed my diaries and sealed the journey with one sigh. And one smile.

I was only looking for the quotes but I found fond memories instead. I was only looking for the quotes but the vague memories of the past became vivid all of a sudden. I was only looking for the quotes and the past came dancing alive in front of my very eyes. I was only looking for the quotes...... *deeeeep sigh. one smile*

And lying on my bed, getting the sleep that I need, another hour was spent though for the aftermath...the "hang-over." I was half-asleep. Or maybe was half-awake. Half-unconscious. Or maybe half-conscious. Whichever. Thoughts came rushing in. The ramblings and all. 

The past...they are but just words now written on a diary...one smile...the ramblings again...the past...they are but just plain memories now stored in the memory bin...one sigh...one smile...more ramblings...the past...now they were just a history...one deep sigh...one smile...the ramblings again. Tomorrow would be another day. A part of the future I have yet to live.

Ramblings...ramblings...ramblings. 

It was then I finally dozed off.

RIP, my dearest friendster blog :(

you know the feeling of losing something that had become a part of you? sad, ain't it? and that's how i felt before when i first learned that friendster would be doin' a major modification. and it's not about losing my profile and pictures there that saddened me but about losing my first-ever blog. :'(

i heard about blogging in 2004 but tried the thing in 2005 and so www.rojane.blog.friendster.com was born. i can still clearly remember my first trial post. BROKE was the title. haha! what a way to start a blog! hahaha! oh, well. i was a neophyte in blogging then so, pardon me. ☻ and from that first entry, i knew i found a friend. a friend who's gonna take in ALL my rants, my stories, my innermost thoughts. without a single complain. so yeah, Innermost Thoughts had been the title of my first blog.

hay. it's really saddening, you know. i've typed almost all my 2+ years of my life and thoughts there so i can look back and have a glimpse of the past whenever i wish to. and then suddenly it's gone! huhu. and it's all because of that stupid, sh*tty, crappy makeover!!! so what had been my first entry was exactly the way my blog had ended. BROKE. the online link to my past was broken. but......

thanks to Solite i was able to print ALL my entries! haha! to those clueless about Solite, it's the company i worked at for 2+ years (from 2004). and man, i tell you! i did nothing there but to blog! aside from pretending to work. ☺ 'coz with the amount of work i had there, it felt like i got no work at all! so we, Solite girls, resorted to just do our own things to while away time. and i ended up strumming the keyboard, pouring out my thoughts of the moment.

going back, yeah, thanks to Solite i have hard copies of my first online diary! :P so what i have right now in mind is to little by little put my past here in blogger. what would be the essence of my blog title tagline, "this is my heart, my soul, my life. this is me," if i won't include the me before? after all, our pasts play a major part of who we are today, right? and yeah, i still want to re-read online not just my old thoughts, but also the innermost of it. ☻

so if you'll see a note at the beginning of my succeeding posts that the entry is from my friendster blog, you know what it means -- it's a glimpse of the past. ;-)

still a LOT to do

i love traveling. you get to visit beautiful places that you don't get to see in your everyday life. you get to taste food that are local and native to the place. you get to learn about different culture and the kind of people living in the place - how they speak, what they do, their interests, etc.

i have a mental list of places i want to go to. and if only i have lotsa money to finance this desire! oh, brother! isn't it frustrating to not do whatever you just wanna do 'coz you don't have enough resources? they say money can't buy happiness. whoever first said that must've been a rich, grumpy ole man lying on his bed with dextrose running thru his hands, just waiting for his final breath. joke. :D i mean, maybe yeah, money can't buy ALL the happiness in the world but it can actually buy some. :D like if your happiness is as costly as having a mansion in an elite society, or may it be as cheap as a scoop of ice cream, money is still needed to buy those. get what i mean? so what money cannot buy are just those happiness that don't have a market value like having a good night sleep, a big appetite, one great love, good health, so on and so forth. so what i'm just trying to say is that, money can actually buy you happiness, though not all.

anyway, back to my desire to travel, maybe i'm just quite alarmed now that i still haven't gotten to the places i want to visit here in Au. and my 1 month has already passed. so i still have 2 more months to roam this place, so that means i only have 8 Saturdays left! 8 Saturdays 'coz you see, apart from malls and parks, i can only visit places on Saturdays, that is, if i want my sister and her family as my companions. and golly, i still have this list:

1) Lone Pine Sanctuary
2) Gold Coast
3) Sunshine Coast
4) Movie World
5) Wet 'n Wild
6) Sea World
7) Southbanks
8) Sydney

also, i wanna try to experience riding in their train, their bus and their ferry, explore brisbane city and take a lot of pictures. so maybe i have to do some things by myself. anyway, i find it exciting traveling alone in a foreign place and i wanna experience that. but yeah, you know, the desire is there. it is just the courage that i still don't have now. haha. 'coz exciting it may seem, it can be pretty fearsome, too! like getting lost, getting caught for whatever reason...things like that. i really have this very low sense of direction, you know. so getting lost in a foreign place is quite likely. hehe. but i have to be positive. maybe i'll just bring TomTom with me. 'coz with IT, there's no way i'd be lost! haha! oh yes, you read it right, it's IT. and to those of you who don't know tomtom, here it is.

TomTom is a GPS navigation unit. it shows you exactly where you are and leads you to where you wanna go. as in in full details! what street you should cross, what time you'll get to your destination, the speed required, etc. it even alarms you if you're over-speeding! my only problem with TomTom is that, i think it doesn't work for commuters! haha!

anyway, i just wish myself and my list good luck!

Welcome to the World, Baby Julian! ♥

after 9 months, finally! baby julian's out! yipeeee!!! jazel's due was on sept 27 and julian made his way out to the world on the 29th. and boy, is he so cute!!! jazel and jovil were blessed with yet again another cutie little boy.

lemme take note of the major details of my second nephew.

born on sept. 29, 2011, 4:48PM (Au time) at Wesley Hospital, weighing 2.98kg with length of 47cm, baby julian was very much welcomed to the world!




and oh, he is such a crybaby! especially in his first days! every time he wakes up, he cries. every move, he cries. every sound, he cries. but thank God that as days pass, the cries are gradually ebbing. now, he just cries when he is, of course, hungry!!! hehe.

allow me to end this post by singing this song....

♪♫ May the good Lord bless and keep you
La-la-la-la-la-la-laaaah ♫♪

Lost in Translation, NOT! In Pronunciation, YES! :D

while boarded in the plane to Au, i was asked by this Australian stewardess what drink i want. here's how it went.

stewardess: what drink please?
me: regular Coke
stewardess: regular....?
me: Coke
stewardess: regular what? (with confused frown)
me: COKE (stressing the one word)
stewardess: oh, CAWK.


my golly!!! i didn't know that the Coke, which i pronounced as KOWK, is pronounced as KAWK here! mehn, they're so sleng, i mean, slang!!! :))

and oh, here are more "sleng" words courtesy of josh!

carret (carrot)
bacen (bacon)
missien (mission)
parret (parrot)

now i got the technique. just change the O to E and the A to O. so my real name now, according to a friend in Ph, is read as rejanne (rojane). hahaha. thanks, bjey! haha!

G'day Australia!!!

i had been so busy the past month 'coz I was preparing to leave for Australia. yeah, sure, I was pretty excited about it but when THE day was at hand, i must admit that though it's just gonna be a 3-month stay, i cried buckets!!! :(( haha! it's just hard to leave people that matter in your life, even if it's just gonna be for a short time.

anyway, i was past that and i know i have to brush off the thought if i want to enjoy every moment here. so i want my travel be documented...now that i'll be having lots of time. so, welcome me, my blog! it's been quite a loooong while, and i missed you! :)

THE day: Sept 12, 2011 at 7:50PM
i flew Cathay Pacific from Manila to Hongkong. it's a two-hour ride. and HK airport, though they're some kinda strict on liquids (they had me emptied my 500ml tumbler! that got me looking for the nearest CR afterwards. haha!), is really a nice one, with their duty free named as free duty! :D the ceiling is just awesome too! and look, they even have this free internet booth! ain't that cool????



mine had a connecting flight so from HK to Brisbane, i flew Qantas. what's really nice in flying international is the FOOD!!! a meal consists of a bit of everything, the main entree, juice/soda, milk, bread, desserts and a side dish! how can i even eat all of those on a plane? i had a night flight and so the two meals i had were served at 12:30AM (past midnight) and 7AM! golly! how can i eat plenty at those given times? so i only finished like 1/3 of the first meal and thank God that for the second meal, i ate almost everything! :D one more nice thing is that they had snacks and drinks available all throughout the flight! wow! but i didn't get any of those 'coz yeah, antukin that i am, i slept throughout the trip. zzzzz. haha!



what i thanked God the most for during the trip was that i got to my destination safe and sound!!!! yeba! it was my first time to fly a thousand miles ALONE and mind you, the butterflies in my stomach weren't really so funny! but yeah, thank God! also, i passed thru the immigration without a bit of hassle. there are really many things to thank God for, right?

oh yeah, by the way, i had a lost-in-translation encounter on the plane, i mean, lost in pronunciation! haha! i'll blog it next time. ;-)

gotta go! see yah!

on leaving comfort zones

Life doesn't always require us to simply just wait. There are times we also have to make the move. Eventually, I know I will have to give up some things, even happiness, just to have what I want. But giving up present happiness doesn't mean giving up future happiness, too. It doesn't mean that I won't be happy in the days after. Living life is taking risks, and I want to brave all risks. I'm confident. I'm strong. 'Coz I've been telling myself that no matter where I'll be, my God will forever remain the same and He'll always be with me. I'm confident. I'm strong. Because I know for a fact that the God that I know is the GREATEST in the whole wide world!!! And that God? Hmmm..."will NEVER leave me nor forsake me." ;)

ooppsss, i did it again!

bathing and playing in the rain, that is. since Phil. Independence fell on a Sat this year, the non-working day was moved to Mon, June 14. it isn't like everyday that i get the chance to bathe in the rain so when the chance knocked, i grabbed it. :D

the sweetest lie

i had dreamed of, so far, the most impossible dream last night. and it was, by far, the bittersweetest. it was, by far, the sweetest lie.

fragments:
"ate mo ang the best," said to the youngest sis, with tears in his eyes
"remember the time when i laid my head on your lap and told you that i would love you forever? totoo yun."
"september 13, 2010" (--> what's this? so out-of-period! weird.)

ha! dreams. don't you sometimes hate their inconsistencies?...their contradictions with reality?...their weirdness?

don't make me dream like that again. please. don't make me hopeful, even a bit, that the dream could be true. please.

ym status batch 1

i love blogging. but time has been ungenerous for the past year and so, much as i wanted to write, i don't have enough time. and so, my rantings and thoughts were shortened to just one to three liners and were posted to my mini blog called ym status. hehe. can't remember anymore the many status i was in before but here are some of those that i can recall. written from recent to past.

june 4, 2010: haist, bat ba naman kase napabilang pa ko sa listahan na yun. why, was i that bad to be in the list? do i deserve it??? grrr.

may 18, 2010: tsk..tsk..tsk..too bad that the world is so full of lazy people. if only people are paid for what they are really worth or rather, by the amount of work they do, guess everyone will be embracing their own load. too bad life isn't that fair. tsk..tsk..

may 11, 2010: nakakapanghinayang lng. ewan ko nga ba. parang we let the chance for a better Phils. pass.

feb. 18, 2010: gimme 3 VERY good reasons to...hang on. 'coz know what? i don't want to anymore.

jan. 15, 2010: take a deep breath. take it all lightly. and smile. *sigh* fool yourself if you must.

nov. 11, 2010: life, nowadays, is switching from one channel to another channel i can't understand a single demn thing! good luck!

well, that's just it...as far as i can remember. anyway, i'll be noting all the ym stats from today onwards so i could post them down here. so there. the bits and pieces of me for the many months that passed.

Silip sa Aking Balota

May 10 election is nearing. Very nearing that I can already see the schools packing with voters, see the ink on my right index finger, smell the different scents of people when under the sun (some remain good, but most don't. hehe), see people getting pissed off with the new voting system, most especially if a glitch (even minor) occurs, see familiar faces and having a chat with them, and of course, the ballot. The precious ballot.

My ballot would read.....(note: at this early pa lang, I would like to say sorry sa mga matatamaan at masasagasaan. Blog ko 'to. Magblog din kayo. hehe).

......GIBO as my president. My Gibo. My idol. Hehe. Why him?

I'm basing my judgment on his personality, not to mention his credentials which, by the wy, never fail to make me go "wow" with matching action of the surprised smiley in ym. :D

He has ambitions. He dreams BIG. He knows what he wants and the most inportant is, he makes ways to achieve them. Bilib ako sa mga taong minamaximize ung angking talent/talino nila. Si Gibo, hinde nakuntento sa kung ano yung naabot na niya. Pag alam pa niyang may mas kaya pa siyang abutin e inaabot niya. Para sa ikabubuti. Take for example his educational background. He graduated cum laude of law in UP, top-notcher of the bar exam in his batch. But he didn't settle for just that. He took masters at Harvard and became a bar passer there, too. Na-wow ako.

Bilib ako sa mga taong may pangarap at inaabot yun. Lahat ng tao ay may pangarap. Maliit man yun o malaki. Pero hinde lahat ng tao e naabot/inaabot yung mga pangarap na yun dahil marami ang nakukuntento na lang na maging pangarap yun. (ouch!!! :D) Siya, hinde siya kuntento na hanggang pangarap lang yun. He was interviewed about his lovelife. Noon, nakita raw niya yung misis niya (who still wasn't his wife during that time) sa isang magazine, and he said to himself, hinde raw siya magpapakasal pag hinde yung babaeng yun pakakasalan niya. Look at him now, he's married to the woman on the magazine. Na-wow uli ako.

Nangangarap siya pero hinde yung tipong suntok sa buwan. Yung pangarap e achievable. May isang nagsabi na gagawin daw Sg ang Pinas. I dunnoh kung sino nagsabi nun kase kwento lang naman saken. Ang sagot daw ni Gibo: Nung naging Singapore ang Singapore e it took years. Hinde yun magagawa ng isang presidente sa isang termino niya na 6 years lang. Siya, hinde siya mangangako ng ganung klaseng pangako na suntok sa buwan. Kung ano ang kaya niyang gawin sa isang termino e yun ang gagawin niya. Kakabilib sumagot. Matalino talaga. Hinde siya bombastic magsalita na gaya ng maraming kandidato. Na-wow tuloy ako.

Positive campaigning ang ginagawa niya. Hinde naninira. Kahit lumabas yung issue na nilaglag siya ni Gloria, hinde niya pinatulan. I just read yesterday that in one of his interviews, nasabi niya na unusual daw yung style niya for campaigning. Ayaw niya i-spoon feed ang madla. Lemme quote what he said: "Voters should use all means available to them, particularly those in the internet to really find out rationally and objectively why they should vote for one or the other candidate. That's the obligation of the citizenry which will make for a mature electorate and a more informed electorate." Such a brainy statement. Kaya lang kase, hinde ganun ang majority ng pinoy. Gusto i-spoon feed. Gusto sumabay sa agos, sumabay sa nakararami. Tamad gumawa ng paraan para maka-derive ng sariling opinion, ng sariling paninindigan. Makiki-share at aakuin na lang din ang opinion ng iba. Makikinig. Hinde maghahanap. Kaya, eto ko, kinakampanya ka. Ako na lang ang mag-i-spoon feed at ako na lang ang maninira para sa 'yo. Haha!

I've been asking people kung sino presidente nila. At pag hinde si Gibo, why not him. These were the often answers that I got and my answers to each.

1) He's under Gloria's wings since pambato ng administrasyon.
My side: Matalino si Gibo. And generally speaking, hinde basta-basta nagpapadikta yung mga matatalinong tao. May prinsipyo sila. May paninidigan. May ego. Kaya more often than not, ayaw pa nila ng dinidiktahan sila, unless otherwise you prove to them that you're right and they're wrong.

Si Gibo ay si Gibo. Si Gloria ay si Gloria. May kanya-kanya pa ring personalidad. May kanya-kanya pa ring pamamaraan at paniniwala. Parehas man ng partido, magkaibang tao pa rin sila.

2) Yung winning ability daw. Hinde daw mananalo. Sayang lang boto mo.
My side: Election was not made for us to vote for who we think will win. We vote for who we think is right for the position. Saken, hinde sayang boto mo kung matalo man kandidato mo. Magiging sayang lang isang boto kung hinde mo binoto yung tingin mong nararapat sa posisyon. Kung boboto lang tayo dahil yun yung tingin nateng mananalo e di sana wala na lang election. Sana e i-survey na lang nila tayo nang bonggang-bongga. Sayang lang yung gagastusin ng bansa para sa election kung ganun lang din yung basis. It's a wrooong thinking, para saken.

So there. Those are the reasons why I'd cast my vote for him. Gusto kong sumakay sa eroplano na minamaneho niya. Gusto kong sumama sa pag-abot sa pangarap niya para sa Pinas.

TOPIC 2: Why not other presidentiables?

(Again, am very, very sorry sa mga matatamaan. I do respect your choice but then again, this is my blog and I just want to let out, so let be. :D)

On why not Noynoy.

Walang isang salita. Walang kongkretong plano. Walang sariling disposisyon. Nagpapadala sa agos. Sabi noon, hinde tatakbo. Cory passed away at nag-claim yung tao na tumakbo siya, to which he obliged. Kahit wala sa kanyang plano. Nadadala sa udyok. Pano pag naging presidente na siya? Pano kung may plano siyang gawin para sa Pinas at may kumontra (whic is totoong mangyayari kase kahit anong gawin mo, mabuti man o masama, laging may kontra. Given na yan.) Ano, hinde na lang itutuloy kung sakaling may mag-udyok na naman? Laging may dalawang boses ang taong-bayan. Sa isang proyekto, may nagye-yes at may nagno-no. Never naging isa ang boses. At kung ang gusto niyang pakinggan ay ang taong-bayan, kaninong boses ang pakikinggan niya? Kaninong plano ang susundin? You have to have your plan. And do it. You have to have your word. And walk it.

Number 2. Pikon. Not emotionally stable. Tinanong kung baket si Villar ang sinabi ni baby james sa isang campaign niya. Ang sagot, e kase baka bihira lang marinig nung bata na binabanggit yung pangalan niya kaya siya na lng bumanggit. And I happen to not like the answer which, by the way, was the main reason why my dislike for him emerged. To me, the answer sounded more like a bata na napikon sa kaaway. He should've answered truthfully. He should've said na syempre, obvious naman na sa tv e panay villar at jingle ni villar yung mabilis maregister sa utak ng bata, kaya ganun. Let's say that it's obvious naman na and one doesn't have to state the obvious. But if need be, you have to. If the answer was just a joke or just to lighten the mood, you're running for the highest position and you shouldn't answer questions that could be misinterpreted, as much as possible. Be careful. Think first before you talk.

Malakas loob ngayon. Kase madaaaaming supporters, in fairness. Pero pano pag naging pres. na? For sure may masasagasaan siya at dadami ang batikos. Karamihan sa tao, ang madalas makita ay yung mga mali at panget na nagawa mo pero parang nabubulag at mabilis kumalimot sa nagawang maganda. Kakayanin ba niya ang kaliwa't kanang batikos ng pinoy? Kung ngayon pa lang e magpi-people power na daw pag nadaya. Pag-aalsa na agan aang nasa isip gayung hinde pa nagsisimula ang botohan. At ano nga ba ang basis ng isang tao para masabing nadaya siya sa election? Ang survey? Kung ano ang laman ng survey e dapat ganun din kalabasan ng boto? Survey vs. election = thousands vs. millions (of voters). Surveys are opinions of just a certain number of persons but it won't really speak for ALL.

Sabi para sa pagbabago daw. Ano'ng pagbabago kung people power pa rin ang naiisip. Naka-ilang people power na ng tayo di ba? May nabago ba? Ganun pa rin naman. Nami-misuse ang people power. Nao-overuse. Tapos ngayon, people power na naman? Hinde naman pagbabago nadudulot ng people power eh. Ang pagbabago e kung tayo ay nagkaron ng unity. Sa people power, isang araw lang united ang pinoy -- sa mismong people power. Pagtapos nun, ilang araw o buwan lng, kanya-kanya na uli.

I'm getting out of the topic, man! Going back. Sige. Hinde siya mangongorrupt/corrupt. But how about the lower officials, the lower authorities, mapipigilan bang wag sila mangorrupt? Ang hinde niya pangongorrup won't mean na mawawala ang corruption. Mababawasan lng ng isang corrupt pero ang corruption, hinde mawawala. Hard to admit but it's the truth. Nasa sistema na yun ng politics. We can't simply take it off just like that. Kahit san namang bansa e may corruption din. Kahit sa private sectors, meron, hinde lang sa gov't sectors.

Sorry uli sa madaming nasagasaan ko. Don't worry, love ko pa rin kayo. :) And I mean that with all my heart. I want to clarify that my opinion on anyone you choose does NOT equate to my perception of you personally. It has no bearing.

On why not Villar.

Simply because of the so many issues. The issues say it all. Let's say na hinde pa naman proven guilty sa mga binabato sa kanya. Pero siguro naman sa dinami-daming binabato sa kanya e posibleng kahit isa dun e totoo.

On why not Erap.

He was given the chance before but he was ousted. I won't give another chance for a not-good history to repeat itself. There are still better options to choose from.

On why not Gordon.

Hmmmmm.....may Gibo na kase ako eh. :D And.....

.....ho-hum. *yawns & stretches* It's past 1AM already (when I'm composing this). My senses are slowly signing out and I can't think and type much na. Just leaving you one thing. PLEASE VOTE WISELY. MAy you have reasons for voting the person and may those reasons be reasonable. Do your part. Cast your vote. The future depends on you. You may only be one but your vote counts.

May the upcoming election be a peaceful and a successful one. Happy voting!!! :)

sweet dreams

i just can't help laughing everytime i'm reminded of my last night's (sweet) dream. :D

there are various kinds of dream, right? there are those that seem like you're just watching a TV.....and you are the lead actor/actress. ito yung mga tipo na parang hiwalay ka sa sarili mo at pinapanuod mo lng yung sarili mo. tipong hindi mo aktuwal na nararamdaman yung ginagawa mo sa dream mo. i don't know if you get what i mean buth that's it. and there are those, too, that you very well know that you are just dreaming and that you will wake up afterwards.

and the best kind, especially if those are sweet dreams, are those that feel....oh so real. the ones that feel like they're happening for real tlga! you can feel right through your skin, you can feel your heartbeat, you can feel real emotions. and that was the kind of dream i had last night. hahaha. it makes me laugh again.

background ng TUNAY na pangyayari kahapon:
i dated someone yesterday. it was actually not a romantic type of date. uhmmmm...more of, let's just say, an obligatory date. kind of. 'coz in my younger sister's church, they have this annual banquette -- where singles get to date somebody from the church. so if one was already asked for, boys have to go look for another one, type man nila or nde, as long as you have a date. but if you don't really want to, they won't force you naman eh, so no pressure. but for the sake of fun or whatever, why not? it's just like a getting-to-know-each-other thingie. no strings attached, no commitments, no whatsoever. in short, there's no chance of you to lose something. in fact, you'll be able to gain one friend pa.

so there, i had dated that kind of date last night.

and here's the continuation. only, it was just a DREAM. that i wished was real. haha!

somebody got jealous of me dating somebody else. and that jealous somebody? hah! it was no other than gerard anderson! wahahahahaha! *laughing hard and rolling on the floor* kelan pa ba ko naging si kim chiu?!?!?!?! haha!

haaaay, funny. we were lying on the bed (doing absolutely nothing malicious, just to be clear. defensive?! hehe) and ar was there, too. he was combing my hair. and syempre ako naman e sarap na sarap. favorite ko yun eh! yung suklayin and paglaruan yung buhok ko ng iba. hehe. it makes me sleeeepy.

him: ganda ng buhok mo. anlambot. *while combing and stroking my hair*
me: sige, tuloy mo lng. sarap eh. hehe. para makatulog ako.

conversation that i cannot remember continued. but here are bits that i can recall.

me: usog ka nga dun! nahuhulog na ko eh!

blah..blah..blah...

then he asked me something serious that i cannot remember (na naman!). so i faced him. e masikip yung kama. so our faces were really so close.

him: *murmuring and wearing the tampo face* kaw ha, meron ka pang paakbay-akbay kanina e samantalang nung ako ka-date mo e wala. hmp.
me: *smiling* ahhhh. yun ba? di ko naman inakbayan yun ah. hinampas ko lng eh.

him, with the still tampo face. and me, with a bubblethought that read, "hayaan mo, ikikiss kita mamaya."

and then i woke up. hahaha. i was soooo biten that it ended there. mamayang gabi, irerecall ko uli ung dream. baka sakaling magkaron ng continuation eh. hehehe. ganun naman minsan diba? :D

p.s. i was a bit confused though. baket mukha ni gerald? e nde naman sya yung crush ko ngayon. si derek ramsay! dapat si derek ung lumabas sa panaginip ko diba? oh, well. it was still a sweet dream, nontheless.

"keep the change"

this morning, i boarded a jeep that has this uber dugyot kundoktor. eow kung eow! normally kase umuupo ako sa likod ng kundoktor. yun yung lagi kong pwesto. kaya lng pag-upung-upo ko kanina e ayan na. andyan na ung buga ng yosi smoke that i uber hate! so i gave up my fave spot and transferred to the driver's side na mejo malayo sa driver kase maaabot pa rin ako ng usok dun. so nakasimangot akong nakatingin sa kundoktor. and then i saw his eowness.

eto ang estima ko. he looks that he's in his mid-sixties but he's only prolly in his late fifties. dahil mukha syang mabisyong tao kaya naisip ko yun. anyone who has a lotta vices would look older than their age, di ba? going back to describing him....maitim, mukhang 2 days nang hindi naliligo, madumi kuko. pero ok lng yung ganun eh. mate-take ko pa din un for a kundoktor. pero tsong, ung pagblow nya ng nose nya for how many times using his bare hands na parang papaliparin na lng sa hangin kng anuman ung lumabas....ung pag-spit nya outside, tas pag-blow nya uli....ay $*&@#*&%$!!!!! that is precisely something i couldn't take!!!! eeeeeekkk!!!! so while looking at him and seeing his kadiri way, i muttered "EOW" *sabay iling* under my breath.

and i said to myself that no matter what happens, as in NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, hinding-hinding-hinde ako mag-aabot ng sukling ibibigay nya sa mga pasahero. keber ko kng magalit ang sinumang magalit. eow eh!!! and buti na lng e meron akong exact coins for my fare, dahil kng wala at susuklian nya ko, i surely would say, "keep the (friggin') change."

rainy days and sundays always lift me up

yesterday was a hoooot day! it was scorching! and so humid! and then the clock striked at around 6:10pm. then came the heavy rain. yahoooo!!!

i was helping preparing the dinner when the rain came. it rained hard and i was feeling hot that i had the urge to go out and bathe in the rain. so i gave in to my childish want. i went straight to the terrace and embraced the summer rain! ahhhh...suuuper sarap! parang malaking shower! i wanted to invite sissy so i would have a company soaking in the rain. but then, i was kinda worried too that she might catch a cold. so i dismissed the thought. and so she just offered to take pics of me! haha!

i laughed, danced, sang and showered in the rain! literally. sarap!!!

thank God for yesterday's rain. i hope that it always rains on weekends....so i can give myself away into it. except of course on days when i have "lakads".

rain, rain, rain on me!!!

dear heart (1st)

i've long thought of writing about matters of the heart....my heart -- what it says, what it whispers, what it longs, what it feels, what it thinks (as if it ever thinks! haha) and other things that a heart is capable of. dear heart. that would be an appropriate title for this..."series"...'coz i know there'll be mooore "dear heart's" to come. reminds me of the sharon-and-gabby movie. anyways, here's my first post of "dear heart".

dear heart,

hi. i know you've been really, really silent for a long, long time. there are times though that i feel you beating loud. but it doesn't last long. some take days, or even months, but never a year. i guess you just came to a point where you easily get tired of things...easily fed up. i guess nothing really lasts forever. errrr, on second thought, maybe some do last for some...but not for you. you think, too?

i just find it quite funny how people around you kind of "sell" you. you're unattached, i know. but i do know, too, that you don't wanna be "sold". we both enjoy being free. you can do anything you want, date whoever you want (and even those you don't really want) without getting emotionally involved. and that is soooo safe. that way you get to enjoy every moment without getting yourself hurt....or getting ourselves hurt. so, so safe, right?

the spinster word used to scare me a lot. but not anymore. ahhhh, boy, i love this freedom! and boy am i thankful that at least you're cooperating, huh! oh, dear heart, thank you for your silence. *mwahugs to you!*

sincerely yours,
jing

b.o.r.e.d.

i'm glad that boredom doesn't kill a person. for if it does, i'm dead now. totally dead.

in our field of work, or any office work i think, there are times that you would wish that you could just chop yourself in order to get all those work done. toxic, that's the term. and there are also moments that you do not have anything to do at all. the term now is petiks.

so petiks i currently am. and it just sucks that my "diversions" are all blocked! no facebook, no friendster, no multiply. haaaay. demmit. it's just well that blogspot is not blocked. yet. i dunnoh if our IT has a plan of blocking it in the future. god forbid.

i admit that i miss blogging. it's just that now, i'm not in the mood to blog. there are a lot of times though that i really want to blog but i just didn't have time. napaka-wrong timing din naman kse!

hay. so now, i'm just ranting. pissed that the "diversions" are blocked. bored. don't have anything to really say or blog at all. screw 'em!

haha! baaad.