sweet dreams

i just can't help laughing everytime i'm reminded of my last night's (sweet) dream. :D

there are various kinds of dream, right? there are those that seem like you're just watching a TV.....and you are the lead actor/actress. ito yung mga tipo na parang hiwalay ka sa sarili mo at pinapanuod mo lng yung sarili mo. tipong hindi mo aktuwal na nararamdaman yung ginagawa mo sa dream mo. i don't know if you get what i mean buth that's it. and there are those, too, that you very well know that you are just dreaming and that you will wake up afterwards.

and the best kind, especially if those are sweet dreams, are those that feel....oh so real. the ones that feel like they're happening for real tlga! you can feel right through your skin, you can feel your heartbeat, you can feel real emotions. and that was the kind of dream i had last night. hahaha. it makes me laugh again.

background ng TUNAY na pangyayari kahapon:
i dated someone yesterday. it was actually not a romantic type of date. uhmmmm...more of, let's just say, an obligatory date. kind of. 'coz in my younger sister's church, they have this annual banquette -- where singles get to date somebody from the church. so if one was already asked for, boys have to go look for another one, type man nila or nde, as long as you have a date. but if you don't really want to, they won't force you naman eh, so no pressure. but for the sake of fun or whatever, why not? it's just like a getting-to-know-each-other thingie. no strings attached, no commitments, no whatsoever. in short, there's no chance of you to lose something. in fact, you'll be able to gain one friend pa.

so there, i had dated that kind of date last night.

and here's the continuation. only, it was just a DREAM. that i wished was real. haha!

somebody got jealous of me dating somebody else. and that jealous somebody? hah! it was no other than gerard anderson! wahahahahaha! *laughing hard and rolling on the floor* kelan pa ba ko naging si kim chiu?!?!?!?! haha!

haaaay, funny. we were lying on the bed (doing absolutely nothing malicious, just to be clear. defensive?! hehe) and ar was there, too. he was combing my hair. and syempre ako naman e sarap na sarap. favorite ko yun eh! yung suklayin and paglaruan yung buhok ko ng iba. hehe. it makes me sleeeepy.

him: ganda ng buhok mo. anlambot. *while combing and stroking my hair*
me: sige, tuloy mo lng. sarap eh. hehe. para makatulog ako.

conversation that i cannot remember continued. but here are bits that i can recall.

me: usog ka nga dun! nahuhulog na ko eh!

blah..blah..blah...

then he asked me something serious that i cannot remember (na naman!). so i faced him. e masikip yung kama. so our faces were really so close.

him: *murmuring and wearing the tampo face* kaw ha, meron ka pang paakbay-akbay kanina e samantalang nung ako ka-date mo e wala. hmp.
me: *smiling* ahhhh. yun ba? di ko naman inakbayan yun ah. hinampas ko lng eh.

him, with the still tampo face. and me, with a bubblethought that read, "hayaan mo, ikikiss kita mamaya."

and then i woke up. hahaha. i was soooo biten that it ended there. mamayang gabi, irerecall ko uli ung dream. baka sakaling magkaron ng continuation eh. hehehe. ganun naman minsan diba? :D

p.s. i was a bit confused though. baket mukha ni gerald? e nde naman sya yung crush ko ngayon. si derek ramsay! dapat si derek ung lumabas sa panaginip ko diba? oh, well. it was still a sweet dream, nontheless.

"keep the change"

this morning, i boarded a jeep that has this uber dugyot kundoktor. eow kung eow! normally kase umuupo ako sa likod ng kundoktor. yun yung lagi kong pwesto. kaya lng pag-upung-upo ko kanina e ayan na. andyan na ung buga ng yosi smoke that i uber hate! so i gave up my fave spot and transferred to the driver's side na mejo malayo sa driver kase maaabot pa rin ako ng usok dun. so nakasimangot akong nakatingin sa kundoktor. and then i saw his eowness.

eto ang estima ko. he looks that he's in his mid-sixties but he's only prolly in his late fifties. dahil mukha syang mabisyong tao kaya naisip ko yun. anyone who has a lotta vices would look older than their age, di ba? going back to describing him....maitim, mukhang 2 days nang hindi naliligo, madumi kuko. pero ok lng yung ganun eh. mate-take ko pa din un for a kundoktor. pero tsong, ung pagblow nya ng nose nya for how many times using his bare hands na parang papaliparin na lng sa hangin kng anuman ung lumabas....ung pag-spit nya outside, tas pag-blow nya uli....ay $*&@#*&%$!!!!! that is precisely something i couldn't take!!!! eeeeeekkk!!!! so while looking at him and seeing his kadiri way, i muttered "EOW" *sabay iling* under my breath.

and i said to myself that no matter what happens, as in NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, hinding-hinding-hinde ako mag-aabot ng sukling ibibigay nya sa mga pasahero. keber ko kng magalit ang sinumang magalit. eow eh!!! and buti na lng e meron akong exact coins for my fare, dahil kng wala at susuklian nya ko, i surely would say, "keep the (friggin') change."

rainy days and sundays always lift me up

yesterday was a hoooot day! it was scorching! and so humid! and then the clock striked at around 6:10pm. then came the heavy rain. yahoooo!!!

i was helping preparing the dinner when the rain came. it rained hard and i was feeling hot that i had the urge to go out and bathe in the rain. so i gave in to my childish want. i went straight to the terrace and embraced the summer rain! ahhhh...suuuper sarap! parang malaking shower! i wanted to invite sissy so i would have a company soaking in the rain. but then, i was kinda worried too that she might catch a cold. so i dismissed the thought. and so she just offered to take pics of me! haha!

i laughed, danced, sang and showered in the rain! literally. sarap!!!

thank God for yesterday's rain. i hope that it always rains on weekends....so i can give myself away into it. except of course on days when i have "lakads".

rain, rain, rain on me!!!

dear heart (1st)

i've long thought of writing about matters of the heart....my heart -- what it says, what it whispers, what it longs, what it feels, what it thinks (as if it ever thinks! haha) and other things that a heart is capable of. dear heart. that would be an appropriate title for this..."series"...'coz i know there'll be mooore "dear heart's" to come. reminds me of the sharon-and-gabby movie. anyways, here's my first post of "dear heart".

dear heart,

hi. i know you've been really, really silent for a long, long time. there are times though that i feel you beating loud. but it doesn't last long. some take days, or even months, but never a year. i guess you just came to a point where you easily get tired of things...easily fed up. i guess nothing really lasts forever. errrr, on second thought, maybe some do last for some...but not for you. you think, too?

i just find it quite funny how people around you kind of "sell" you. you're unattached, i know. but i do know, too, that you don't wanna be "sold". we both enjoy being free. you can do anything you want, date whoever you want (and even those you don't really want) without getting emotionally involved. and that is soooo safe. that way you get to enjoy every moment without getting yourself hurt....or getting ourselves hurt. so, so safe, right?

the spinster word used to scare me a lot. but not anymore. ahhhh, boy, i love this freedom! and boy am i thankful that at least you're cooperating, huh! oh, dear heart, thank you for your silence. *mwahugs to you!*

sincerely yours,
jing

b.o.r.e.d.

i'm glad that boredom doesn't kill a person. for if it does, i'm dead now. totally dead.

in our field of work, or any office work i think, there are times that you would wish that you could just chop yourself in order to get all those work done. toxic, that's the term. and there are also moments that you do not have anything to do at all. the term now is petiks.

so petiks i currently am. and it just sucks that my "diversions" are all blocked! no facebook, no friendster, no multiply. haaaay. demmit. it's just well that blogspot is not blocked. yet. i dunnoh if our IT has a plan of blocking it in the future. god forbid.

i admit that i miss blogging. it's just that now, i'm not in the mood to blog. there are a lot of times though that i really want to blog but i just didn't have time. napaka-wrong timing din naman kse!

hay. so now, i'm just ranting. pissed that the "diversions" are blocked. bored. don't have anything to really say or blog at all. screw 'em!

haha! baaad.

4 months recapped

oooohhh, i miss my blog. and i so missed blogging! what's it been? 3 months? 4 months? ah, 4 months! 4 months of silence. either i was so busy i couldn't write or i just want to keep some things to myself. anyways, here's a recap of the past months. the highlights, at random order.

oct 08:
- the date

nov 08:
- visited the remains of lg's mom at heaven's gate
- ar's bday
- zellie's package (was it in this month?)
- whiling away time in antipolo with my, of course, new antipolo buddy
- started harvesting the fruit of my hardwork (or my PA) *wink-wink*
- a couple of movies with lg: my only u (hihi) and twilight

dec 08:
- ICS' Christmas Party at Crowne Plaza (again!!!)
- the 4th of nov 08 (again) with the same person
- oh, the SAGADA adventuuuuuuure!!!! (i so heart this!!!! will do a separate blog for this)
- daddy-o's (whom i fondly call popsie-cle now) bday
- the overnight (my gosh)
- the BEST gift, which comes from an unexpected person (yahoooooo!!!! this made my Christmas, materially speaking. gimme five!)
- meeting with my solite friendly friends at this italian-but-owned-by-a-pinoy resto (sarap dito! i should remember its name! dang.)
- a disappointing Iskul Bukol
- Sanuk been introduced to me. it was really a love at first sight. oh, love at first feel is better. ( i will have one, i feel.)
- earned another...."fan" (?) hehe. only from the same sex. (oh.my.gulay!)

early jan 09:
- cleaned up the "forest" that has grown in front of our house (oh mehn, this was such a manly job! i tell you. but i did it. i even scrubbed the walls!!! whew!)
- painted some part of the terrace white (another manly job. and it left me "bagsak")
- jan celebrators' bday treat at G-squared (again), Dampa Ortigas
- Pier One after the above, with an unwanted and unwelcomed company. hihihi. (baaaad)

my other side: the reasonably mean moi

mean-ness #1:
i saw his supposedly "other half" on fwendster. 'nyemas. pretty naman pala eh. e ba't naghahanap pa sya ng iba? ano bang tingin nya sa mga babae? ulam?!?!? kelangan tikman ang iba't ibang putahe dahil nakakaumay pag isa lang?!?!? loko. buti sana kng mala-rich@rd g. pa sya. haha. pero hinde rin, dahil kahit siguro mala-ganun pa un eh, di moi rin papatusin un. siguro titikman lng. hahahaha. chos!

mean-ness #2:
bad trip. sa makuliiiiiit na caller ng h$bc! but i couldn't friggin' blame him din 'coz he's just doin' his job. and becoz partly, i blame myself for it din. coz i was too trusting. demmit. so fault na rin pala ngayon ang magtrust easily?!?!? ganun?!?!? whatta lyf! yang mangungutang na babae na yun ha. don't she ever dare cross my path kung ayaw nyang makatikim ng galit na bonggang-bongga! haha. di naman ako yung taong mabilis magalit e. nagagalit lng pag talagang kagalit-galit na. at ngayon e naiinis na tlga ko. haynakoh, wag lng tlga magkrus landas namen. haha. tapang e noh? and on second thought, kahit naman siguro magkrus landas namen e di ko rin naman alam na sya na pala un. dahil di ko naman tlga sya kilala. hehehe. baka nga nagkrus na pala landas namen eh, and who knows? baka nangitian ko pa sya. haha! stooopid!

mean-ness #3:
isa sa mga pet peeves ko ang txts from 29-syete-syete. kase sayang yung oras ng pagdampot ng fon, pagread ng msg at pagdelete ng msg! and almost always, when the fon beeps, you would initially think that it's from someone whom you'd been waiting to txt you, only to read the friggin' advisories and promos! darn di ba?!?!

mean-ness #4:
speaking of pet peeves, isa din sa list ko na yun ang electronically operated stoplights! kase naman noh, di naman nila nakikita kung saang way na ung kelangang i-go and anong way ang kelangang i-stop! coz they were programmed to shift lights every god-knows-how-many minutes. naka-green ang wala namang sasakyan na dumadaan while naka-red pa ang humahabang linya ng mga sasakyan. argh! those moments piss me so much especially in the mornings when there's a time-in that i would have to catch up. darnit.

isama ko na rin pala sa list na 'to ung mga bus drivers na dupang sa pasahero. like we all have to wait for 5 minutes para maisakay lang ang 3 tao! ehhhh, mang cesar, ikaw ba yan?!?! haha.

just ranting...

galit ka ba? magsalita ka nga! tell me! don't give me this deafening silence! you once said that you are straightforward. then what happened?

may nasabi na naman ba kong nakakainis? masyado ka kaseng sensitive. o mean lang ako? ewan. pero i'm so, soooo tired of saying sorry for things na super babaw lang naman. sorry na lng ako ng sorry. di ko alam kng masyado lang ba kong maguilty-hing tao or what. at ngayon, ang hirap mag-sorry na hinde ko naman alam kung ano dahilan. nakakapagod magrewind nang magrewind ng conversations dito sa utak ko para hanapin kung may nasabi na naman akong na-hurt ka.

haaaay. bahala ka na nga. kung ayaw mo, e di huwag. hmp.

isa pang nakakainis... ang lamig dito sa opisina! grrrrr! OA!!!! eto nga't nakakaramdam na ko ng symptoms of cough and cold o. pahinaan nyo nga aircon!!! demn.

may dimple nga pala ko!!!

hahaha! actually kase sa sobrang liit nya at sa dalang nya lumabas, e nakalimutan ko na na may dimple nga pala ko! hahaha. and i was only reminded of that little fact this morning. when the gustong-magpapansing LRT guy clerk e di pa rin inaabot ung train's prepaid(?) card na binili ko. i slid my 100-peso bill on the counter and.....

him: "hi mam." *smiles*
moi: *deadma mode with the brows slightly frowned. (kse suuuuuper ngmamadali ako. nghahabol ng oras lagi. mataray mode, in short.)*
him: "si ma'am oh. ba't naman naka-ganyan (simangot) kayo?"
moi: *laughing* "e manong kse ngmamadali na ko ehhhhh."
him: "yan. dapat ganyan. ganda ng dimple nyo oh." *finally giving the card*
moi: "hahaha." *took my card and left*

come to think of it. may pumansin din sa dimple ko. kakatuwa. dahil all my life, ngayon ko lng actually na-feel na existing pala ung tuldok na un. haha. actually may nakapansin na rin before the LRT guy. yung classmate ko from college pa na like 2 months ago lng napansin dimple ko.

her: "jing, may dimple ka pala? bat ngayon ko lng napansin? ngpalagay ka?"

joking time after. hahaha.

****
bull. hanggang kelan ko ba tataguan 'tong h$bc na 'to? bull uli. kase una, yes, it's MY card, but heck, it's NOT my utang anyway. ba't ba naman kase may mga taong ang kakapal ng mukha na makikigamit ng card mo at di naman pala magbabayad?!?!? 15K?!?! bull tlga! at ba't ba naman kase din may mga taong nagtitiwala sa mga taong ni hindi naman tlga nila kilala? in short, mga taong tanga? gaya ko? bull tlga!

****
LG isn't texting me anymore. i mean, since yesterday up to this moment. pro'ly because i didn't reply twice of his messages apart from the so many forwarded txts? it's because i didn't have a load, darling. he's nothing special really. he doesn't even mean anything to me. and yet i want to receive txts from him. and it quite bothers me that there's none. argh!

hmmmmm.....not my type, but i want him to txt me? weeiiirrd!!!

deliverance: my birthday wish

ask for wisdom and not deliverance. yan ang sabi ng pastor namen kapag may pagsubok daw na dumating sa buhay. parang yung hiningi ni king solomon kay Lord noon. wisdom.

masunurin naman akong bata. pero minsan, tumataliwas rin. at isa ito sa mga "minsan" na yun.

i've been facing this for 9 years, more or less. and i think that i've gained enough wisdom within that long span of time. hindi naman po siguro masama Lord kung hingin ko naman ang deliverance kahit para lang sa aspetong ito. i think 9 years is enough. kahit pa-birthday Mo na sa 'kin.

it saddens me, in a way. asking for deliverance from this. because for 9 years, i actually have been asking for it. and i know how to take no for an answer. and so deliverance is the right thing to ask this time. it's the only route that's right. i know. and i know You know it, too.

so, though teary-eyed, for deliverance i pray.

rainy days and lovelife

ahhhh...coldness, coldness. i love this kind of atmosphere. the kind of feel a storm or a rain leaves behind. medyo mahangin, malamig, at may makikita ka na kahit pano na sikat ng araw sa likod ng grayish na ulap. this is one of the few occasions when i would want myself to have a looong, long walk. be it alone or with a relative/friend you love to have a chat with. and share your laughters. tama na saken ung maramdaman ko yung dampi ng malamig na hangin sa mukha and sa katawan ko sa ilalim ng hinde mainit na araw. and ma-enjoy ang not-so-often na ganung klaseng panahon. parang baguio on ber months. ahhhh, sarap.

that feel is exactly the atmosphere right now. but i couldn't have the long walk i've been dreaming of. i'm here stuck inside the office, slightly petiks, listening to the old love songs an officemate is playing (na hinde ko naman type pakinggan sa ngayon, kse nasa mode ako ng alternative today), and yeah, doing blogging in between inquiries and quotations. namimiss ko tuloy ang mag-blog ng tutok sa pagbo-blog lng.

anyways, pray ko lng e sana ma-extend ang "remnants" ng bagyong helen until over the weekends. so i'd have the time to enjoy it. and not just dream about it. sure, masarap mag-dream. pero mas masarap pa rin tlga if yung dreams mo e nangyayari din in reality.

***
blogging makes me think of and miss a lot of things. my solite friends, going night-outs, staying over a friend's house, videoke, malling, jazel, jovil and josh and our Sunday routine -- going to church and malling afterwards or watching a movie, -- the things we (me and my first batch of solite friends) do in the office when the bitchy boss is not around, and yes, i confess i also miss having a lovelife. and before this becomes an issue, i'd like to clear that it's the lovelife itself that i miss and not necessarily the ex. they're two different things.

i want real love this time. not the one built by empty words, lies and broken promises. now, will that ever come to me?

aaaahh, rainy days and after-the-rain days just make me wonder of a lot of things. kung lahat lang sana ng lovelife e blossomed on the grounds of true love noh? sarap siguro ng buhay....

at the moment

sleepy. petiks. in need of cash. hungry. craving for wendy’s burger and frost. thinking about the soon-to-be renovation of the bathroom -- what color combination and style. wanting to go back to bora and wanting my whole family to be with me this time. dreaming, for the nth time, for an slr camera. wanting my mug back. wanting to buy a nice pair of shoes to match the new office uniform. thinking about the maong skirt and the yellow shirt that i just bought -- when will i use them. laughing at an officemate’s joke. wanting to go to some place i haven’t gone to yet. missing the feeling of being in love. missing talking with a guy over the phone for hours. giving up yet still dreaming for the real thing (anubayun?!?!). missing my sister jazel and her family. missing being with them. hoping for a mid-year bonus.

this is me at 2:35PM this 2nd day of july 2008.

some things this recent past

i actually saw it coming. it usually comes days before the period, i observe. so i was expecting it na rin. like it has become a part of monthly this and that. in need of something you do not have. thirsty for something you cannot drink. and then you'd just find yourself curled up like a baby still in her mother's womb. waiting to be born. but in this case, to be free. or be freed.

and i hate feeling like that. i really, really hate it. you have so much to give and yet you cannot just give out. you are so in need of so much and yet you don't know where to get it. helpless. and hopeless. such a poor case, loser.

***
on a happier note, pacquiao won again. over diaz this time. yahoooo! i'm proud to be pinoy. but guys like him make me prouder! ang saya-saya! he's now like Michael Jordan in the field of boxing. and imagine the celtics having their pictures taken with him?!?!? wow! i hope that i get the chance to have a picture with him, too. opportunity, knock on me pleeeeaaase?!????!

***
sissy. she's now in her pre-school. and the financial need is getting more and more intense. her folks couldn't support her studies. and so here we are. not really capable of sustaining the needs of a pre-school kid but we're still trying. for the love of her. we don't want to enrol her in a public school merely because we don't trust how they handle and teach the toddlers there. maybe when she gets a li'l older and/or when she's aready quite learned but definitely NOT when she's still -- raw. mahirap na baka kung ano pang inputs ang maabsorb ng utak niya, or worse, baka walang inputs na iabsorb yung utak nya. so now, we're striving hard for her private studies.

mahirap lng kse para kang biglang nagkaanak. biglang nagkaroon ng obligasyon at dumepende totally sa yo financially. much more if you're not that financially stable yet. i got teary-eyed once when i was on my way home because of this burden. but we care for the kid. so upon reaching home, all i did was to ask her for a hug. pampa-lift up ng spirit and pang-relieve na rin ng bigat na dinadala. "halika nga sissy, payakap nga." and true enough, nakakagaan nga.

haaay, the burden of parenting when you're yet single. kamusta naman.

***
i'm happy with my job. for now. ang medyo tumutulak lang saken to consider going abroad is the gawddang money! and kng wala lang sana kameng pinapaaral, i'll be doing just fine with my salary. pero that's not the case. meron na ngayon so cost-cutting ka muna ha. wala munang impulsive buys. wala munang mga "ok lng" or "pwede na" na mga gamit/damit. dapat kung may bibilhin ka man, dapat yung talagang gustung-gusto mo lng na tipong sa pagtulog e dinadala mo pa rin.

cost-cutting muna ha. cost-cutting muna, dear.

Lovin' Bora....the second time around

here's the link for my boracay escapade with PMG-SWP from June 12-14. thanks HP!!! mmmwah! :*

http://privatejing.multiply.com/photos/album/12/Lovin_BORA.....the_second_time_around_D

missing me

oh my. i used to be a blogger. i mean, a certified blogger that updates constantly. just writing about everything and anything. even the mundane details and things that really don't matter. now what? i can't even write about the major events and important things that are supposed to be noted. my drafts are slowly piling up. when will they be published? or will they ever be? the busyness is not really the issue. it's about my writing skills. i'm not that good at all a writer but the one that i have has somehow ebbed. and it saddens me. coz i've always wanted to write. it's one of my favorite outlet. sigh.

i miss the jing of the "The Sands of Time (Part I)". i miss the flow of thoughts, the way of writing, the passion, the heart. where is she now? seems like there's not a single trace of her here. maybe it has something to do with the site? maybe she's more at home with the first one? the place where she was born? so maybe she left her heart there? i don't know. i really don't know. and i just wish that i know. i'm starting to sound crazy here and i'm not sure if anyone feels me.

oh god. i really miss the way i write before..... :( whatever happened???

'twas gone with the wind but.....

after yesterday, i realized that i haven't completely gotten 'round yet to....doing it. but i would like to think that i'm getting there. hoping against hope that i can.



"sa panaginip na lng pala kita maisasayaw....."

and after yesterday, i got the above and the following pics after doing a li'l photography using just my camphone. it may haven't captured much but good photography, after all, isn't really about capturing the perfect scenery through the lens of a top-of-the-line cam, ayt? actually it's the other way around. it's all about how the picture captures the heart of the viewer....how it converses with him. anyways, my subject for this urge to shot? some kids out in the street, my cousin, sissy and me.




apparently, the professional camera that i'm dreaming to have, i have yet to save enough to finance it. :( hopefully this year. hopefully.

spell ImPoSSibLe

the dreams that i will never achieve...the "sky" that i will never reach :(

- owning a Leica M-series camera
- to travel the world
- to have a biological brother
- be a popular professional singer (or be just a plain good singer)
- to be a fashion/ramp model
- have not just enough but lots and lots and lotsa $$$ (!!!)
- have the body akin to Charlize Theron and the lips like Alicia Silverstone's
- be an actress, a good actress
- to fly like a bird, soooo up and awaaay and to be so freeee!!! ayus! eenjoyin ko ang sky...ang lamig ng hangin sa gabi, ang kagandahan ng paligid sa umaga. pupunta ko sa lugar na gusto kong puntahan, lilibot, lilipad, nanamnamin ang pagdampi ng hangin sa king katawan. ahhhhhh....sarap! (wag lng sana kong tamaan ng tirador! haha)

"nais kong lumipad
tulad ng agila
at lumutang-lutang
sa hangin
magkaroon ng pugad
sa puso ng kagubatan
ngunit ito ay panaginip lang
at maaaring di matupad.."

-- joey ayala

dialling line wut???

calling the wind of change.....pls blow in my direction. pliiiiiis!

wHeN tHe GooD TurNs BaaaaD

whatever happened to the country's most prestigious beauty AND brain pageant? i am not a gramatically perfect person myself, i don't wanna criticize, i understand what this pageant does to the nervous system, but just the same, i am just any other person that loves to laugh. :D oye, i always laugh at myself too, if that helps. :D

anyways, here's the Q&A portion of the crowned Bb. Pilipinas World '08 herself.....
(sidenote: a good laugh at someone's expense is not good at all. then again, there is also the word "but," isn't it? i know i will be traveling on a guilty trip after by posting this, BUT.....)

==========
Paolo Bediones: Janina, how are you?
Janina San Miguel: I’m fine.
Paolo Bediones: Alright, so you won two of the major awards - Best in Long Gown, Best in Swimsuit, do you feel any pressure right now?
Janina San Miguel: No, I don’t feel any pressure right now. *smiles*
Paolo Bediones: Confident! Alright! Please choose a name of the judge.
Paolo Bediones: We have Miss Vivienne Tan.
Vivienne Tan: Good Evening.
Janina San Miguel: Good Evening.
Vivienne Tan: The question is, what role did your family play to you as candidate to Binibining Pilinas?
Janina San Miguel: Well, my family’s role for me is so important b’coz there was the wa- they’re, they was the one who’s… very… Hahahaha… Oh I’m so sorry, Ahhmm… My pamily… My family… Oh my god… I’m… Ok, I’m so sorry… I… I told you that I’m so confident… Eto, Ahhmm, Wait… Hahahaha, Ahmmm, Sorry guys because this was really my first pageant ever b’coz I’m only 17 years old and ahahaha I, I did not expect that I came from, I came from one of the taft 10. Hmmm, so… but I said that my family is the most important persons in my life. Thank you.
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my say? i guess they have this (sense of) humor factor which eats up the 70% of the criteria? hehehe. omg, i'm so sorry....flease porgive me. lol. no offense. :D

"SpeCiaL"

i just wonder why some people just can't give more or extend compassion on persons we consider special. not the "special" in terms of heart matters but the "special" as in special child. i mean, why do some people get easily irritated by the "special" ones when the latter make a fuss over some petty thing, when they overreact on certain issues, when they misunderstand what we said, when they commit some mistakes due to misunderstanding. don't they more deserve further explaining than giving them a cold shoulder or a roll-of-the-eyes expression?

why can't some people see that they are so blessed they didn't turn out to be "special" and that the least they can do is to treat those that are with extra patience, extra compassion, extra love, extra everything? that we are to treat them specially because they deserve it, they need it, they crave for it. why.can't.they? sigh.

there are a lot of things we've taken for granted, a lot of blessings we cannot see. i guess all we need is just to open up our eyes more to see more. and then widen up our minds to learn to appreciate and value when we see one.